Which Is More Understandable? Buying Jim Harbaugh’s Game-Worn Pants Vs. Other Weird Celebrity Things

Jim Harbaugh might be a maniac. He always looks angry, his voice never seems to go below 250 decibels and…he seems to wear the same pants every day. That’s probably because he does. Or, the same style, anyway.

Turns out, Jim Harbaugh apparently has an addiction to $8 Walmart khakis – what a delightful scandal! His addiction is so noteworthy that the 49ers store is actually selling a pair of his authentic game-worn pants. Which is…a little weird. But what’s more understandable – purchasing a pair of Harbaugh’s pants, or buying some of the other grossest, weirdest things in celebrity history? Let’s go to the tape:

(credit: Wesley Hitt/Getty Images) (credit: Mark Mainz/Getty Images)

Jim Harbaugh's Pants

Other Celebrity Things

Such as - how to put this delicately? - did Harbaugh sweat in these pants? Have these been washed? This raises all sorts of questions about Jim Harbaugh’s underwear hygiene that I don’t want to consider.	VS. Britney Spears’ Gum	It’s gross because it’s chewed gum (which sold for $14,000!). I don’t care whose mouth it was in. That said, in the grand scheme of things, there are grosser things than, you know, saliva and such.
...and nothing that weird.	VS. Justin Timberlake’s Breakfast	After an interview in 2000, Justin Timberlake left two pieces of French toast untouched. They sold on eBay for over $1,000. The winning bidder said she would “...probably freeze dry it...then put it on my dresser.” Ew ew ew EW EW!
…	VS. Elvis’ Hair	Collecting hair might be the creepiest thing in the history of the world. And even if it’s Elvis’ hair, any sympathy I might have once had went out the window during research, because it forced me to read about the man who authenticated it. A man who lives in Connecticut who does nothing but collect samples of - and authenticate - celebrity hair. (!!!)
...I mean, at least you can see, feel, and wear pants.	VS. Brad Pitt and Angelina Jolie’s Exhaled Air	Oh my God I can’t handle this country. People bought this for $529. How...how did people get their hands on this? Did they sneak up and just put a mason jar in front of both actors when they happened to have their eyes closed?
Yep. Pants wins. We’re done here.	VS. Jerry Garcia’s Toilet	I can’t. It sold for over $2,000. You guys I can’t.

Such as - how to put this delicately? - did Harbaugh sweat in these pants? Have these been washed? This raises all sorts of questions about Jim Harbaugh’s underwear hygiene that I don’t want to consider.

VS. Britney Spears’ Gum

It’s gross because it’s chewed gum (which sold for $14,000!). I don’t care whose mouth it was in. That said, in the grand scheme of things, there are grosser things than, you know, saliva and such.

...and nothing that weird.

VS. Justin Timberlake’s Breakfast

After an interview in 2000, Justin Timberlake left two pieces of French toast untouched. They sold on eBay for over $1,000. The winning bidder said she would “...probably freeze dry it...then put it on my dresser.” Ew ew ew EW EW!

…

VS. Elvis’ Hair

Collecting hair might be the creepiest thing in the history of the world. And even if it’s Elvis’ hair, any sympathy I might have once had went out the window during research, because it forced me to read about the man who authenticated it. A man who lives in Connecticut who does nothing but collect samples of - and authenticate - celebrity hair. (!!!)

...I mean, at least you can see, feel, and wear pants.

VS. Brad Pitt and Angelina Jolie’s Exhaled Air

Oh my God I can’t handle this country. People bought this for $529. How...how did people get their hands on this? Did they sneak up and just put a mason jar in front of both actors when they happened to have their eyes closed?

Yep. Pants wins. We’re done here.

VS. Jerry Garcia’s Toilet

I can’t. It sold for over $2,000. You guys I can’t.

The winner is

Jim Harbaugh's Pants

4 out of 5

With a score of 4-1, I’m ashamed to say that a pre-worn pair of pants is not one of the weirdest things you can buy. Way to go, America.
-Brian Cullen, CBS Local Sports contributor

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